文 | 张好
By Hao Zhang
写作这篇成长分享文章时，脑中浮现的就是《骑在银龙的背上》这一首歌，它伴随了很多个加班的日夜和开庭路上的时光。这首歌曲来自《五岛医生诊疗所》这部电视剧，讲述的是，孤岛上的医生五岛，骑着单车穿梭于村落之间治病救人，克服困难，用精湛医术和真诚态度赢得岛民信任，找到自身生命的意义的故事。“银龙”是五岛治病救人时骑的自行车，也象征着医生手中闪亮的手术刀。
As I sat down to write this piece about my growth, the song "Riding on the Back of the Silver Dragon" came to mind. It has accompanied me through countless late nights of work and journeys to court. This song comes from the TV drama Dr. Kotō Shinryōjo, which tells the story of Dr. Kotō, a doctor on a remote island, who rides his bicycle through village after village, treating patients and overcoming difficulties. With his superb medical skills and sincere attitude, he wins the trust of the islanders and finds the meaning of his own life. The "Silver Dragon" is the bicycle Kotō rides to save lives, and it also symbolizes the gleaming scalpel in the doctor's hand.
图片来源https://movie.douban.com/photos/photo/2886012182/
从毕业到现在，我已经从当时懵懂的法学生，成为知识产权出庭律师。过去八年，在不同律师事务所，以实习生、辅庭律师、主办律师到现在出庭律师的身份，经历了百余起案件和庭审，各类型的争议纠纷，许许多多的客户，还有我的前辈、同事、年轻的伙伴们，这些有幸同行的人们。
与其说我选择了这份职业，我更认为是它选择了我，让我发现了它的意义和与自己的契合之处。这个过程并不容易，需要时间带来答案。
Since graduation, I have transformed from a naive law student into an intellectual property trial lawyer. Over the past eight years, working at different law firms in roles ranging from intern, associate attorney, lead attorney, to now trial lawyer, I have experienced over a hundred cases and court hearings, various types of disputes, and have had the privilege of working with numerous clients, as well as my seniors, colleagues, and young partners—all those fortunate enough to have walked this path with me.
Rather than saying I chose this profession, I prefer to say it chose me, allowing me to discover its meaning and how it aligns with who I am. This process has not been easy and has taken time to reveal its answers.
作为诉讼律师的“难”
诉讼律师的抗压属性
刚入行时，我时常觉得诉讼律师太具有挑战性。诉讼律师总是处在“冲突”和压力前线。庭审带来的压力和紧张感，像一次次大考。其实诉讼的场域非常复杂，既要面对诉讼相对方，又要面对裁判者的询问和要求，还要兼顾旁听当事人的感受。庭审的过程高度集中，既要顾全事实细节和法律依据，又要实时感受氛围、倾听和理解问题，完成陈述、说服、回答和反驳，见缝插针地尽可能多和有效地传递观点。
我也经历过很多次冲突性很强的庭审。以前常常遇到来自对庭律师的“人身攻击”和轻蔑态度。大概是一种庭审策略，律师在庭上经常成为被攻击和针对的对象。在一些律师的“游刃有余”“油滑圆润”策略之下，年轻人的竭尽全力仿佛变为愚笨，积极发言好像显得经验不足。有一次开完庭，对方律师核实原件时对着我方实习生咆哮，我赶紧上前对线解围，心里觉得又气又好笑，自己也不曾面对过几次这种场面呢。还有一次庭后我方修改笔录，第三人在旁轻蔑嘲笑发出噪音，我两次制止后对方直接开骂。有时会因厌恶此类行为而引起情绪波澜，常常想，好想变成“高坚果”，永不破防，也曾反复考虑自己是否适合走这个对抗路。
对于案件不可控因素的无力感
我们有无限的决心，但是往往只有有限的时间和掌控能力。案件的审理法官、案件的审理走向和节奏，甚至开庭时间等等不是我们可以完全预见或掌控的。案件改判或争取结果过程中有很多流程，具有不确定性。印象非常深刻，我们代理的一起二审案件，进行了充分的准备，争取到较为少见的二次开庭，我方有三名律师参与，配合得很好，庭审效果不错。在我方当事人进行发言后，我进行总结发言，那时我想到当事人的遭遇，问题的错误，纠正判决的期待和愿望，还有一起为付出案件的日日夜夜，情绪瞬间涌上心头。庭审上，合议庭也表现出对我方有利的倾向，已经关注到了一审判决的问题，我好像看到离胜利已经很近了。然而，最后因为种种原因，但还是未能实现改判。那一刻，真的觉得太难了。当然，还有实在难以改变的他人认知，无法争取的延期、开庭等等，也让人备感无力。
自我定位与行业定位之间的差异
在我眼里，我和同事们都是斗士。作为诉讼律师，每次全副武装冲锋陷阵，都是一场巨大的心力和情绪调动。我们追求极致精专，以自身的专业和能力为骄傲，对于案件倾注个人的情感和心血，牺牲了大量个人时间甚至个人计划安排，已经数不清多少次因为周末后和节假日后的开庭而放弃假期和休息。但是，每次看到群里大家发的“拼了！”，我都觉得力量注入手臂，我们真是同路人。我有时开玩笑说，烧香拜佛拜的都是案子，愿意把运气用在当事人案件上。
正因如此，有时也会牵动超出案件本身的情绪，为准备了很久的PPT没有全部展示而郁闷，为所听到的不负责任的发言感到愤慨，为无人倾听观点而感到沮丧，为未能挺身再多说一句而感到遗憾，默默复盘和内省自己的语气和表达方式，是不是哪里不对了。
但是有些时候，行业的生态导致在部分场景下，对于律师欠缺理解和尊重，甚至存在较差的刻板印象，律师的努力、用心和价值难以被看见和理解。在这种时候，就会产生身份认同问题和失落感。
The "Difficulties" of Being a Litigator
The Pressure-Bearing Nature of Litigators
When I first started, I often felt that being a litigator was too challenging. Litigators are always on the front lines of "conflict" and pressure. The stress and tension of court hearings feel like major examinations. In reality, the litigation arena is highly complex. One must face not only opposing counsel but also the judge's questions and demands, while also considering the perceptions of the parties observing the hearing. The trial process demands intense focus; you must attend to factual details and legal grounds while simultaneously gauging the atmosphere, listening and understanding the questions posed, presenting arguments, persuading, responding, and rebutting—seizing every opportunity to convey your points as fully and effectively as possible.
I have experienced many highly contentious hearings. I used to frequently encounter "personal attacks" and contemptuous attitudes from opposing counsel. This is likely a trial strategy—lawyers are often targeted for attacks in court. Under the strategies of some lawyers who appear "effortlessly skillful" and "slick," the earnest efforts of younger lawyers can seem clumsy, and active participation may seem to signal inexperience. Once, after a hearing, opposing counsel yelled at my intern while verifying original documents. I quickly stepped in to confront him and defuse the situation, feeling both amused and annoyed that I, too, hadn't faced such scenes many times. On another occasion, after a hearing, a third party made sarcastic remarks and noises while we were amending the trial transcript. After I warned them twice, they directly started swearing at me. Such behavior sometimes stirs emotional waves within me. I often think, how I wish I could become a "tough nut" that never cracks. I've also repeatedly questioned whether I am suited for this confrontational path.
The Helplessness Over Uncontrollable Factors in Cases
We have boundless determination, but often only limited time and control over outcomes. The presiding judge, the direction and pace of the case's proceedings, and even the hearing schedule are things we cannot fully predict or control. The process of appealing a case or striving for a favorable result involves many steps fraught with uncertainty. I recall vividly a second-instance case we handled. We prepared thoroughly and secured a relatively rare second hearing. Three lawyers from our side participated, coordinated well, and the hearing went effectively. After our client spoke, I delivered the closing argument. At that moment, thinking of our client's plight, the errors in the judgment, our hope for correction, and the countless days and nights we had dedicated to the case, emotions surged within me. During the hearing, the collegial panel also appeared inclined towards our side, having noted the issues with the first-instance judgment. It seemed like victory was close. Yet, in the end, due to various reasons, the judgment was not reversed. At that moment, I truly felt it was too difficult. There are also other things that foster a sense of helplessness, such as the inability to change others' perceptions or secure adjournments and hearing dates.
The Gap Between Self-Perception and Industry Perception
In my eyes, my colleagues and I are fighters. As litigators, every time we gear up for battle, it demands a tremendous mobilization of mental and emotional energy. We pursue excellence and specialization, taking pride in our professional skills and abilities. We pour our personal emotions and efforts into our cases, sacrificing large amounts of personal time and even personal plans. I've lost count of how many holidays and rest days we've given up because of hearings scheduled right after weekends or holidays. But every time I see the message "Let's go all out!" pop up in our group chat, I feel a surge of strength flowing into my arms. We are truly comrades on this journey. I sometimes joke that when we burn incense and pray to the Buddha, we're praying for our cases, and we're willing to invest our luck in our clients' matters.
Because of this, I sometimes experience emotions that go beyond the case itself: frustration when a presentation I've prepared for a long time isn't fully delivered; indignation at irresponsible statements from others; disappointment when my views seem unheard; and regret for not having spoken up more. I silently review and introspect: was my tone or expression wrong somewhere?
However, there are times when, due to the ecosystem of the industry, lawyers lack understanding and respect in certain contexts, even facing negative stereotypes. The hard work, dedication, and value of lawyers can be overlooked and misunderstood. In such moments, I grapple with identity issues and a sense of loss.
一路成长
"骑在银龙背上，去承受风雨吧"
"Ride on the back of the silver dragon, to brave the wind and rain."
尽管有那么多“困难”，我和伙伴们还是走到现在。对我而言重要的原因是一个很好的成长环境。从天同到汇仲，有非常理解、信任和鼓励我的合伙人和导师，也有和我同期一起并肩奋战和共同成长的同事战友。我和开庭搭子一起经历了数不清的去法院的汽车、地铁、高铁和飞机，庭前奋战的深夜，庭后的探讨和复盘，还有累得说不出话的沉默。
对于专业知识的学习欲望和热情，也是从纠结中转移注意力的法宝。我的身边有真正一致追求“极致精专”、敬畏专业的律所同事们，让我更加坚定自己的认识和判断。团队内部和律所里都有培训、律所合伙人们举办的分享交流沙龙和用心为学生们准备的教学课程，都让我感到专业的魅力。团队合伙人说，要对于行业抱有希望，正因为还有不足之处，我们的存在才更有意义。不管别人怎么做，我们要坚持自己认为正确的做法。身边人参与了我行业价值观的塑造，让我知道是非对错。当然，还有给予那时年轻的我信任的客户，毫无保留地托举后辈的团队和律所，带来正反馈的胜诉判决，让人无暇内耗的工作量和身上的责任，很感激能够拥有这些让我不知不觉坚持下去的因素。
坚持着坚持着，逐渐意识到，经历风雨，本身就很有意义，它造就了现在的抗压能力，让我们可以走得更远，我认为这是强大的体现。
就像《骑在银龙的背上》歌词中写道的，困难化作双翼，伤痕作为罗盘，穿过云雨的漩涡，心中所期望的，还是明日要登上山崖，还有远处要解决的苦难。
登上山崖后，也许会看到不同的风景。在高强度和高难度的案件锻炼之下，专业能力和经验得到快速提升，动作逐渐变得娴熟，迅速抓住核心问题然后精准出击的能力大幅提升，哪怕是一周三个庭审，又或是连续四个月的高强度庭审，我们也能够应对。不同节奏和主要类型的知识产权案件，已经基本都代理过，也都形成了打法和经验。办案之余，写作积累文章、举办学术和实务研讨会、与高校合办课程，我们始终握紧专业的手术刀，去解决更多的问题。不知不觉中，我们收获了越来越多的胜诉判决和有影响力的判决，还有更多信赖我们的客户伙伴。
对我自己而言，印象最深的是自己家里有一件纠纷开庭，我认为一审判决明显错误，代理家人出席二审程序。开庭时，我就坐在父亲旁边，法官一开始仿佛不太重视，抬头看了我们一眼，让我们好歹也找个律师。我说，我就是律师。那场庭审，没有让家人说太多，因为我清楚地感到我完全可以做到。开庭后不久，竟然真的收到了二审改判胜诉判决。我感到，“我是我自己的码头！”，这份能量是在这个职业中的努力和坚持所带给我的。
除了能力的提升，成长的乐趣来自于更有力量、更自由地做自己想做的事，不会让“合不合适”“做不做得好”“这次成功了吗”这样的疑问或他人看法，轻易影响前进的方向。尽管仍然会内耗，但总需要将这些先放置一边，或者转变为内修的动力。只要不放弃，就有下一次机会。
我发现我喜欢诉讼律师将专业知识作为利刃、解决争议的角色。知识与话语是我们的“手术刀”，驱动它们的是帮助他人和希望一切更好的心情。尽管冲突令人烦恼，但我经常说服自己总有人要去做这样的工作，总有人需要面对冲突并去解决。
我看到冲突和困难之外，案件还有很多意义和价值。尽管我们所代理的案件并非每一件都那么重大，但是如果有心，总可以发现其中的意义，也可以看到律师在其中推动事情更好的价值。作为代理律师，我们最有机会从矛盾冲突中找到问题和希望，也可以在案件代理中融入和表达我所认为正确的内容，传达负责任、符合价值观的声音，在个案中尝试推动更好的变化。
在代理的一类侵害著作权纠纷案件中，受到所学习知识和价值观念的影响，我感到诉讼对方的部分主张，在法律层面之外更可能会对于文化创作、用户言论、网络空间传播权力产生长远的负面影响，我相信应该表达反对。所以，尽管这并非常规抗辩思路，还是利用周末时间寻找国内外的文献和资料，把它加到代理意见和辩论意见中去，我对此感到非常兴奋。还有一起商业诋毁案件，我们向传播学教授请教，向他学习商业广告的言论空间问题、行业现状和粉丝饭圈文化的相关知识，并请教授出庭向法院说明。这样做不单纯是为了争取案件的有利结果，更是为了真正深入的认识、靠近事件的本质，全面客观地看待问题，从而使裁判者可以得出更为知情和合理的结论。代理律师发出自己的声音，使其产生一点影响或留下一点印记，这使人感到由衷开心。有幸的是，所里的氛围鼓励和认可这样的热情，我能感受到团队从上至下对于知识和专业的尊敬，对做正确的事的坚持，感受到大家在案件分析和学习过程中眼神中闪烁的兴奋和热爱。
冬去春来，未来还有很长的路要走。尽管前方仍有风雨，但我和伙伴们会骑在银龙的背上，穿过漩涡，抵达更远的地方。
The Journey of Growth
Despite all these "difficulties," my partners and I have persisted to this day. A crucial reason for me is the excellent environment for growth. From Tiantong to Huizhong, I have had partners and mentors who understand, trust, and encourage me, as well as colleagues and comrades who have fought and grown alongside me. My frequent trial partner and I have journeyed together on countless car, subway, train, and plane rides to court, worked through countless late nights before hearings, and engaged in post-trial discussions and debriefs—as well as those moments of exhausted silence.
My desire and passion for learning professional knowledge has also been a powerful tool for shifting my focus away from internal conflicts. I am surrounded by colleagues in the firm who truly share the pursuit of "ultimate specialization" and hold the profession in the highest regard, which further solidifies my own convictions and judgments. The firm provides internal training and the partners host salons and teaching courses for students, which all showcase the fascination of our profession. Our partner once said, "We should have hope for the industry. It's precisely because there are shortcomings that our existence matters more. Regardless of what others do, we must hold on to what we believe is right." The people around me have shaped my professional values, teaching me right from wrong. Of course, I am also grateful for the clients who trusted me when I was young, the teams and the firm that unhesitatingly supported the younger generation, the satisfying judgments that bring positive feedback, and the heavy workload and responsibilities that leave no room for excessive rumination. I am truly thankful for all these factors that have unconsciously kept me going.
As I persisted, I gradually came to realize that weathering the storms is itself profoundly meaningful. It has forged my current resilience and allows us to go further. I believe this is strength.
As the lyrics of "Riding on the Back of the Silver Dragon" go: difficulties become wings, scars become a compass, and passing through the whirlpools of clouds and rain, what my heart still desires is to climb the mountain cliff tomorrow and to resolve the suffering that lies ahead.
After climbing the cliff, you may see a different landscape. Forged by high-intensity and high-difficulty cases, my professional capabilities and experience rapidly improved. My movements became more skilled, and my ability to swiftly grasp core issues and strike precisely was greatly enhanced. Whether it's three hearings in a week or intense hearings spanning four consecutive months, we can manage it. We have now essentially represented clients in intellectual property cases of various paces and major types, developing our own strategies and experience. Beyond handling cases, we write and accumulate articles, host academic and practical seminars, and co-organize courses with universities. We always keep our professional scalpel sharp to solve more problems. Unknowingly, we have earned more and more favorable and influential judgments, as well as more and more trusting clients and partners.
For me personally, the most memorable experience involves a dispute within my own family. I believed the first-instance judgment was clearly erroneous, so I represented my family member in the second-instance proceeding. At the hearing, I sat next to my father. The judge initially didn't seem to take us seriously, glanced at us, and suggested we find a lawyer. I said, "I am a lawyer." During that hearing, I didn't let my family member say much, because I clearly felt I was fully capable. To my surprise, soon after the hearing, we actually received a favorable second-instance judgment reversing the original decision. I felt, "I am my own harbor!" This confidence and strength were given to me by the hard work and persistence I've invested in this profession.
Beyond enhancing my abilities, the joy of growth comes from having more strength and freedom to do what I want, and not letting questions like "Is this the right fit?" "Am I doing it well enough?" "Did I succeed this time?" or others' opinions easily influence my direction. Though I still struggle with internal conflicts, I always set them aside or transform them into motivation for self-improvement. As long as I don't give up, there will always be another opportunity.
I have found that I enjoy the role of a litigator, which uses professional knowledge as a sharp edge to resolve disputes. Knowledge and speech are our "scalpel," and what drives them is the desire to help others and the hope for things to become better. Although conflicts are bothersome, I often convince myself that someone has to do this work; someone must face and resolve conflicts.
Beyond the conflict and difficulty, I see much meaning and value in cases. While not every case we handle is of great magnitude, if we are attentive, we can always find its significance and see the value of lawyers in driving things forward. As counsel, we have the best opportunity to find the problems and hopes within conflicts. We can also integrate and express what we believe to be right in our representation, conveying a responsible voice aligned with our values, and attempting to drive better changes in individual cases.
In representing one type of copyright infringement dispute, influenced by my learned knowledge and values, I sensed that some of the opposing party's claims could have a long-term negative impact on cultural creation, user expression, and the power of dissemination in cyberspace, beyond just the legal scope. I believed I should voice my opposition. So, despite this not being a conventional defense, I spent the weekend searching for domestic and international literature and resources, incorporating them into our legal submissions and arguments—something I felt very excited about. In another commercial defamation case, we consulted a communications professor, learning from him about the boundaries of free speech in commercial advertising, the industry landscape, and the fan culture dynamics. We even invited the professor to testify in court. We did this not solely to gain a favorable result in the case, but to genuinely understand more deeply, approach the essence of the matter, and view the issues comprehensively and objectively, thereby enabling the adjudicator to reach a more informed and reasoned conclusion. When a lawyer raises their voice, making a small impact or leaving a subtle mark, it truly brings them heartfelt joy. Fortunately, the atmosphere at our firm encourages and recognizes such enthusiasm. I feel the firm's respect for knowledge and the profession from top to bottom, its adherence to doing what's right, and I see the spark of excitement and passion in everyone's eyes during case analysis and learning.
Winter passes and spring comes; there is still a long road ahead. Though storms lie ahead, my partners and I will ride on the back of the silver dragon, passing through whirlpools to reach distant shores.
作者简介
